Fools! All Night Long!

I don’t know what (c)rapper came up with the idea of encouraging people to not snitch on those perpetrating crimes, but I have a Top 10 list of good jobs for them – ones with a future, but not precisely the futures they may expect.

10. Toxic waste dump truck unloader.

9. Ringed seal in Churchill, Manitoba.

8. Plutonium plant protective suit and glove cleaner.

7. Rocky Mountain Oyster fisherman

6 . Pig Manure spreader without air tanks.

5. Defensive Coach for the ’07-08 Louisville Cardinals football team.

4. Cleaning crew for meth lab operators.

3. Carcinogenic chemical test subject.

2. Hunting buddy of Dick Cheney.

1. George Bush’s personal cock sucker (Condoleeza Rice’s job)

Seriously, if you see a crime committed against me, you know who did it, and you don’t tell the cops all the details, you’re a piece of shit, and I hope you get cancer and die. Really. I wish that on you. I have zero sympathy for people who commit crimes, and I want them locked away. Permanently. Pitch the key down a sewer.

And for the all-night-long fool who came up with the “no snitching” bullcrap, I’d like to introduce you to the Babe – my 34-oz. Louisville Slugger.


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